


Dying Embers

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Embers [2]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Alternate Universe, Apocalypse, Character Death, Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Family, Friends to Lovers, Grief/Mourning, Hope, Hurt/Comfort, Loss, Promises, Time Travel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-25 11:10:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,765
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16660000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: Sequel to Lightning Falls. In the alternative future where the Dragons have won, and where Fairy Tail and mankind have become little more than a memory the last Fairies struggle to find a future to fight for. In the dying embers of crocus, love is found and lost and a seed for a different future is planted.





	Dying Embers

_We’ll survive…Together, we’ll find a way to get through this…_

****

    It was months ago since she’d thought that. Months since they had left Magnolia for the last time, turning their backs on the numerous markers that lay where their friends had fallen and for a time she had allowed herself to actually believe them. It helped that Natsu was always there at her side and although his smile was never as bright as it had once been and shadows were lurking in his eyes, his confidence and hope never seemed to waver. And in the moments when insidious doubts tried to creep in, he seemed to instinctively know, and he would wrap her in a hug and reassure her that they would find a way through this.

    Now, however, she found herself unable to even summon up the slightest flicker of hope as she sat helplessly in the centre of the burning ruins of Crocus. She couldn’t find it in herself to get to her feet and find shelter let alone try to fight as she stared up at the Dragons filling the air over her head, and her arms crept around herself in a self-hug as tears trickled down her cheeks. For months they had searched for any sign of other survivors or a safe haven that had been spared from the destruction, but no matter when they went all they found was devastation and death. They had found the odd trace that other people had passed by, but they had no idea how long ago that had been, and it had reached the point where it felt as though they were the last people alive in Fiore.

   Her vision blurred as her thoughts turned to the Fire mage, and her tears increased, she had lost him hours before when they had been caught by surprise in an attack, reluctantly heeding his order to run after a blast had narrowly avoided covering her in rubble. She hated the fact that she could no longer fight at his side and her heart ached as her hands dropped to the scorched leather pouch still strapped to her belt. The keys inside it now little more than a melted mass of metal as they had been caught in a blast during the first attack on Crocus, stealing her ability to call forth her Spirit friends. Occasionally Loke and Virgo had managed to force their own doors open and come to her aid, but it was sporadic as the barrier between their worlds had been reinforced to protect the Celestial world from the chaos here, and it had been weeks since she had last seen either of them, and she missed them constantly.

“ **Everyone** …” She whispered as her gaze dropped to the beloved guild mark on her hand, tears splashing onto it as she clenched her fists. They had lost so many friends, so many unknown people, and while she knew that her Spirits at least were alive and safe, her heart still ached from the knowledge that she couldn’t see them. “ **Natsu…”**

A deafening roar from above made her head shoot up, her eyes widening with terror as she realised that she had been spotted, but even as fire raked the area in front of her she still couldn’t find it in herself to move. _Perhaps it was best if it all ended here,_ she wasn’t sure she could even bear the idea of continuing to wander through this endless hell in search of people that they were never able to find. As fresh blasts of fire raced towards her, she closed her eyes in readiness, numbly accepting her fate and whispering a prayer that Natsu would continue on even if she was gone.

    Seconds before the flames reached her there was a dull thud, followed by a familiar sound of flames being devoured and even though she had been ready to accept her death she felt a familiar jolt in her chest, and her eyes flew open. Blinking from the smoke and dust in the air she found herself staring up at Natsu’s back as he sucked in the last of the flames, before wiping a hand across his mouth with a satisfied sigh. He looked unruffled, as though he hadn’t just consumed dragon fire to save her life and she reached out to grasp the bottom of his pant leg with a trembling hand.

“ **Sorry I’m late Lucy** ,” he said softly turning briefly to glance down at her, and her eyes widened as she took in the fresh injuries he was sporting, fresh guilt welling up over the fact that she had just left him behind to fight. “ **Bastard…”** He snarled viciously, whirling back around as one of the dragons swooped towards them and there wasn’t the slightest trace of fear in his voice or posture as he stared the creature down before cracking his fists. “ **Hey Morons, quit being cocky! I’m a Fairy Tail wizard, Natsu Dragneel! A Dragon-slayer!”** Fire wrapped itself around his hands at the last bit, and with a whimper, Lucy reluctantly withdrew her hand just as he sprang forward with a fierce roar, and she could only watch in growing horror as he propelled himself skywards into the gathered Dragons.

“ **Brilliant Flame of the Fire Dragon! Roar!”** Even after months on the run and endless battles and defeats he fought just as wildly as he had back before everything went to hell, and even after everything her heart raced to watch him, but it was never enough to bury the overwhelming fear that she might be about to watch his final battle.  “ **Crushing Fang of the Fire Dragon**!” He roared bounding from one target to another, his face set in a grim expression of determination, undeterred even when a sweeping claw sent him flying backwards through the air with a shout of pain.

 **“Natsu!”** Lucy shouted desperately, but after a second he managed to catch himself, flinging himself towards yet another opponent with a fresh growl, but that momentary terror lingered, and she bowed her head sobbing violently now. **“It’s impossible!”** She cried out, realising for the first time that she truly believed that - that she no longer had the hope that somehow they could pull through this, even with Natsu right there in front of her still fighting on for her sake.

 **“Not hardly! I’m still going strong!”** Natsu shouted back as he risked a quick glance down at her, something shifting in his chest when he caught her tearful, defeated expression and he hastily threw himself back into the fight with increased fury. There was no way he was going to allow that hopeless expression to linger on her face. No matter what it took, he would find a way to restore her faith that they could survive this, Macao’s instructions to protect what was most precious to him echoing in the back of his mind and pushing him ever forwards. _I’ll protect Lucy and her future no matter what!_ He had long since lost any concept of his own future or dreams. Instead, he was focused entirely on hers, and now he wished that he’d taken the time to tell her that it was her future that was keeping him going.

    Whether it was because he was slightly distracted by her haunted expression or his own whirling thoughts and emotions, or whether it was just a simple misstep. It was only seconds later that he was caught in the side by a blast of fire and while it did little actual damage it was enough to fling him from his perch, and he couldn’t stifle the alarmed shout that escaped as he tumbled earthwards. There was nothing he could do to halt or even slow the fall, and he closed his eyes as he waited for the impact, certain that even at this height he would survive it, but not without damage he acknowledged seconds before he slammed into the ground, disappearing into a cloud of dust.

 **“Natsu!”** Lucy screamed finally finding her voice again after watching his fall in silent terror, her eyes desperately fixed on the dust cloud that marked where he had landed. She prayed that he would get back up, that he would come back to her even if the end was in sight…she didn’t want to face it on her own. _Natsu, please…_

 **“I ain’t giving up, no matter what…”** Natsu growled as he struggled back to his feet as Lucy’s shout reached him, wincing as the movement told him that he was injured more than he wanted to admit but he stubbornly shoved the pain aside. **“I ain’t going to run away…or go back… This ain’t over.”** He refused to let himself believe that it was over, knowing that if he did then that would be the moment he would falter and all would be lost. Lucy couldn’t fight at the moment, their friends…their family were gone, and there was nowhere for them to go back to. All that was left was the two of them, and he would defend that until the very end.

    Lucy was sobbing once more and shaking her head in denial, not wanting to watch him rush into battle once more, but even before she could try and voice that desire, he was moving. Seemingly uncaring of the overwhelming numbers that he was facing as he charged forward with a roar, flames wrapping themselves around him albeit it more slowly than they had before and then he was gone. Lost once more in the sky and hidden from her sight by endless plumes of fire and the giant forms of his opponents and all she could do was shout out to him and hope that her voice would reach him.

“NATSU!”

**

“Brilliant flame of the Fire Dragon,” Natsu snarled furiously, stubbornly ignoring the fact that his flames were fainter than they had been only moments before as nimbly sprang between opponents, not daring to linger in one spot for more than a moment as he knew from experience that doing so was to make yourself even more vulnerable to attack. Unfortunately that made it impossible for him to focus all his attacks on a set target, not that it would have made a difference if he could, he admitted to himself. He had long since accepted that his once beloved Dragon-slayer magic was not enough to defeat these beasts, and yet despite that knowledge, he refused to back down or give up. Knowing that the moment he allowed such thoughts to take hold, then he might as well surrender and let the Dragons end it.

   There had even been moments when he had actually considered it - when Crocus had fallen, and Gray and the others were lost when Macao and the others died and more recently when Laxus had passed away. But he still had Lucy. And as long as the Celestial mage was alive, as long as she was still there and depending on him, he could find the strength to keep going and to keep fighting despite the unspoken doubts and the growing realisation that they might well be the last of the Fairies. He couldn’t fight for his own sake, not with the doubts over his magic and his foster-father which had grown steadily since the conversation with Laxus, but he could fight for Lucy’s sake. He wanted to give her a world where she would be safe, and where she could make new, happier memories to erase this hell from her mind and it was that, that drove him onwards.

    Nimbly he ducked as one of the Dragons dived at him, wincing as he felt the beast's tail whip past his ear and realising that he had let his attention waver. Growling he numbly sprang at another one, flames wrapping around his fist once more and he noted with concern that the fire was beginning to dim around the edges and even as he punched another beast he wondered just how long he had been up here. He could feel the exhaustion beginning to weigh him down, and he knew that he wouldn’t be able to keep this level up for much longer, but he could hear Lucy desperately calling out to him from down below, and his eyes narrowed.

“LUCY GET OUT OF HERE!” He roared using his magic to amplify his voice, praying that she would hear it and that she would actually heed his words. As long as she was at risk, he couldn’t back down, even if all he was doing was acting as a decoy.

   Unfortunately, that split-second of distraction was to prove catastrophic, as he cried out in pain a moment later as one of the Dragons swooped in faster than he was able to dodge, and he felt some of his ribs give as it slammed bodily into him. Desperately clutching his side as he struggled to draw in a breath, he tried to jump aside as another beast dove at him. However, the pain had slowed his movements, and he felt claws raking across his back sending him skidding across the back of the Dragon he had landed on and only a last-minute twist saved him from being thrown over the edge. Gasping he rolled onto his front, his vision blurring as he gasped for air, vaguely aware of the blood dripping down his back and it took a huge amount of effort to force himself back to his feet.

    Wavering he bared his teeth in a furious snarl, refusing to back down even though he could feel himself swaying slightly, pain and light headiness from the battle he was having to draw in enough air threatening to send him to his knees.

“Damn it, I can’t lose to you,” he ground out taking a step forward as he summoned up his magic once more as he silently added. _I can’t afford to fall here. I can’t leave Lucy alone in this hell._ He adamantly refused to listen to the small voice in the back of his mind that was telling him there was no way he could continue to fight, let alone stand a chance of winning…not that there had ever really been a chance of that. For a brief second fire engulfed his hand, but before he could do anything they flickered and before his eyes they died out, disappearing just as rapidly as they had appeared and he stared disbelievingly at his hand. _No, you can’t run out now…I have to fight…I have to buy Lucy enough time to get away…_

All thoughts were driven out of his mind, as another Dragon slammed into him taking advantage of his shock and an agonised scream escaped as one of its claws scraped up his front, tearing through his skin from waist to shoulder and catching his cheek as it passed over. Before he could even begin to try and rally its tail whipped back towards him, and he was helpless to avoid it, biting his lip to the point of bleeding to stop himself crying out in pain once more as he was flung violently backwards through the air. Desperately he flailed, trying to find something to grasp onto despite the pain the frantic movements was causing, knowing that there was no way he would be able to survive the fall this time.

   For a brief second, he managed to hook the fingers of his left hand in the crack between scales, and he whimpered as he jolted to a halt, his entire body a mass of pain and he was only vaguely aware of the fact that he had managed to stop himself from falling. However, the reprieve only lasted for a couple of seconds as his hand was slick with his own blood and his eyes widened with sudden fear as he felt himself slipping free. Frantically he scrabbled at its scales trying to find another handhold, but he already knew that it wasn’t any use and as he tumbled over the edge he closed his eyes in resignation, realising that there was very little chance of him surviving this time. _I’m sorry Lucy…_

**

“NATSU! NATSU!” Lucy had heard his amplified roar moments before, but she hadn’t been able to bring herself to obey even though she knew that she couldn’t help him fight. There was no way she was going to leave him behind in this place…she had decided long before that if the end had to come, then she wanted to face it at his side and so she had remained where she was. It had been terrifying watching the brief glimpses of the battle that she was afforded, but nothing had prepared her for the sight of him tumbling earthwards once more, and her eyes had widened with horror as she realised that this was vastly different from the last time.

   There was no defiant shouting coming from him, and from what she was able to see he was making no attempt to slow his fall or to twist into a position that would increase the odds of him surviving. Dread pooled in her stomach, and she finally found the strength to move, staggering to her feet as she kept her gaze fixated on his falling figure. _Natsu…_ Realising that nothing was going to stop him hitting the ground, she found herself moving before that thought had fully formed, breaking into a run completely ignoring the Dragons soaring overhead. _She had to get to Natsu…_ Seconds later he disappeared from her sight, only a small plume of dust rising in the distance marking where he had landed and she sped up, terror lending her speed as she prayed that he was okay.

**

   Pain. For several long minutes that was all he was aware of, having never felt this much pain in his life before, and tears trickled down his cheeks as he struggled to breathe. His vision was blurry, with dark shadows slowly creeping in from the edges and he stared blearily up at the sky as a strange numbness began to crawl through his body, slowly quenching the pain burning through him, and he was only vaguely aware that, that was probably a bad thing. Breathing shallowly he blinked as his mind slowly caught up with the present despite the encroaching shadows, and his mouth dropped open slightly as he realised that he was still alive - that somehow he had managed to survive the fall even though he was sure that it should have killed him. Although, it might still succeed he thought dully as he realised that his vision was darkening more rapidly now, and just before his eyes slipped shut his thoughts turned to the Celestial mage waiting on his return. _Lucy…I want to see you again, one last time…_

**

   She wasn’t sure why but the Dragons above her had made no move to interfere with her mad dash towards where Natsu had landed. They definitely knew where she was, she could feel their eyes boring into her from above, and her concern for Natsu had made her throw caution to the wind, making no attempt whatsoever to mask her presence and she was unnerved by the lack of attack. Not that she was going to complain at the moment. The fact that she hadn’t heard Natsu, and that there was no sign of making his own way back to her side told her that the situation was bad, she just prayed that it wasn’t as bad as the situations her imagination was conjuring up for her.

   Finally, she scrambled over the top of a large rubble heap certain that she must be in the right area, only to come up short as her gaze was immediately drawn to familiar sakura-coloured hair.  Even her worst case scenarios hadn’t prepared her for the state that Natsu was in, and it felt as though all the air had been sucked out of her lungs as she stared at him. He was sprawled in the shadow of a wall, half of his body obscured from sight by rubble, and his eyes were closed, and for a terrible moment she froze, terrified that he might be already gone and she could feel the world tilting around her. _Not Natsu, I can’t lose him. Not now._

    It took a tremendous amount of effort to get her legs to work, and she half stumbled, half-scrambled down the rubble heap before dashing to his side. The closer she got the worse he looked, and by the time she reached him, her earlier terror was swiftly morphing into certainty that she had already lost him. There was no way someone could survive wounds like this, especially not after a fall like that and there was already fresh tears streaming down her cheeks as she dropped down beside him. For a moment she hovered over him, afraid to touch him as she took in the horrific gash down his front and the blood covering half of his face, and she had to swallow hard to stop herself from throwing up. She thought that she had become immune to sights like this, but deep down she knew that nothing could have prepared her for seeing Natsu like this.

   Closing her eyes for a moment, she focused on taking deep breaths to try and calm herself, knowing that she couldn’t afford to fall apart just yet. Once she felt slightly calmer, she reopened them only to come up short as she realised that his eyes were open once more, albeit at half-mast, and the world seemed to right itself as she realised that he was still with her. _For now,_ the traitorous part of her mind supplied, and she hastily silenced it as she reached out to grasp Natsu’s hand, shuddering as his blood smeared on her skin. His scarf already marked and stained by previous losses was a mess, covered in his own blood and in some places only hanging on by threads from where it had been clearly caught in the attack, and the sight of it broke her heart as she knew that it would devastate him to see it in such a state.

“Natsu?” Her voice was barely audible, but she knew that he would be able to hear her, but her brow furrowed as she realised how sluggishly his gaze drifted towards her and as she met his eyes it was clear that he was struggling to focus on her and the dread in her stomach expanded. She had never seen him like this, and she had seen him badly hurt many times, her mind drifting back to the days following the battle of Magnolia when they had all feared that they might lose him and she sniffled as she realised that this time that fear might become a reality. “Natsu are you with me?”

“Lu…cy”

    Lucy winced at how weak and raspy his voice, but she squeezed his hand tightly as she caught the note of uncertainty in his voice, confirming her suspicions that he couldn’t see her properly and she was quick to reply although her voice wavered as she spoke.

“Yeah, it’s me.”

    A weak attempt at a smile which looked more like a grimace than anything else flickered across his face, and she could hear the relief in his voice.

“Go..od,” he whispered just before his eyes slipped shut, but before she could panic he managed to force them open once more and this time his gaze was clearer as he tilted his head sluggishly in her direction. “I…was afraid…that I wouldn’t get to…see you,” the _again_ was left unspoken as he descended into a violent coughing fit. Lucy clinging desperately to his hand as she watched his expression twist with agony, wishing desperately that there was more she could do to help him, hating being relegated once more to the role of spectator.

   Eventually, the fit subsided, and he sank back, his chest heaving as he struggled to calm his breathing, and she was horrified to see fresh flecks of blood on his lips and chin, and with trembling fingers, she reached out to brush it away. A futile gesture given the rest of the blood coating his face from the gash on his cheek and the one on his head, but she needed to do something, her eyes burning with fresh tears when he lent slightly into her touch.

“Natsu…” She trailed off helplessly, unsure of what there was that she could say that would make this situation any better for him and she lowered her head as she realised just how useless she was. _Why did you stay with me all this time? How long has it been since I was actually able to help you?_ Slowly his eyes drifted back to her and just as she was about to look away his eyes softened as he studied her, and despite the pain weighing down on him he managed to offer her a tiny smile, and despite the situation, it bolstered her spirit slightly.

“Don’t…look so sad,” he admonished weakly, and all she could do was stare at him incredulously as his words registered. _How else was she supposed to look when he was in a state like this? Especially when she knew that he had only fought for so long for her sake._ “I…just need to rest for a…while,” he added softly as he caught the emotions flickering through her eyes, knowing that that, that was a lie. He could feel himself beginning to slip away a little bit at a time, but there was no way that he was going to admit that to her, not when she was watching him with such a worried expression, with tears still marring her cheeks. He was also scared of admitting it to himself, and he couldn’t understand how Laxus had been so calm when he had been in the same position months ago. He didn’t want to die, he wasn’t ready to die even if a small part of him had begun to acknowledge that it was likely the only outcome of this hell.

“Sure,” Lucy murmured softly, sniffling as she heard the lie in his voice and catching the grim expression that flickered briefly over his face before he could hide it, but there was something in his eyes that pleaded with her to play along at least for now, and she couldn’t bring herself to deny him. Scrubbing roughly at her cheeks to remove the lingering tears she straightened, pasting an expression of determination on her face. “Alright let me clear this rubble off you and then I’ll take a proper look at your injuries.” The cold, realistic part of her knew that these weren’t injuries that she could deal with on her own, and that they would probably have been beyond even Wendy and Porlysuica but she brushed that thought aside knowing that she wouldn’t be able to keep up the façade if she allowed it to take hold.

“’Kay,” Natsu agreed wearily, knowing that it was going to cause him more pain, but he was too relieved by the fact that she seemed willing to play along, for now, to risk voicing a complaint.

    Squeezing his hand once more she then reluctantly released it, before shifting so that she could carefully begin to ease the rubble off his body, relieved that none of it was particularly large. Still, it was slow work as she was terrified of causing more damage, and she bit her lip whenever a pained noise would escape the Dragon-slayer. A quick glance showed that he was struggling to keep his expression and breathing calm and she nearly halted, realising that he was probably in far more pain than he was letting on. Catching her worried glance, he raised his head slightly before giving a small nod to indicate that she should continue and reluctantly she obeyed.

    Needing to do something to at least help take his mind off what she was doing she began to talk in a soft voice, for the first time in months daring to reminisce about happier times in the guild. They had both shied away from such topics for ages as recalling those times tended to highlight everything that they had lost since then, but something told her that today it would be welcomed.

“Do you remember when we first met?” She asked quietly as she continued to work, her lips twitching when he actually rolled his eyes at her before giving a quiet nod of agreement, a faraway expression appearing on his face and she wondered what stood out most for him from that day. Even now after all her time in Fairy Tail, she still couldn’t believe how unbelievably lucky she had been that day even though it hadn’t seemed like it at the time. “You know, I still can’t believe that after months of dreaming about Fairy Tail that I actually just ran into you…” _And that despite barely knowing me you just held out a hand to bring me to Fairy Tail,_ she added silently as she glanced down at the beloved mark on her hand. In that one instance, he had given her everything… _a future. A home, and a family_

“You were always…meant to be a fairy,” Natsu replied quietly, and she froze, colour flooding her cheeks as she glanced at him, finding him watching her with soft eyes and she found herself having to look away in embarrassment. “It…was funny…”  He added after a moment, and she found herself turning back to look at him, catching the wistfulness in his voice and wondering how long it had been since either of them had managed to find amusement in anything, and her tone was genuinely curious as she asked.

“Funny?”

“Listening to you…explaining about guilds…and mages…” He explained breathlessly, and for a moment she gaped at him, before the flush in her cheeks deepened as she remembered how she had babbled on at him and Happy, never once noticing that they hadn’t been surprised or impressed by what she saying. Natsu’s expression darkened slightly as his thoughts followed hers, his thoughts drifting to Happy. The pain from that loss flaring anew although it was dimmed somewhat by the hope that maybe he would get to see him soon… _but that will mean leaving Lucy on her own…Can I really do that? Do I even have a choice anymore?_

   Lucy had caught the shift in his expression, and she knew instinctively where his thoughts had gone, the darkness in his eyes only got this bad when he thought of the little Exceed, and there was an ache in her heart as her own thoughts drifted to Happy.  What alarmed her though was the acceptance that appeared on his face for a moment, and she knew that he was struggling to keep up the façade that he was going to be fine and she felt her hands beginning to tremble… _Natsu I can’t lose you. Not after losing everyone else…_ No, she knew that even if the others were alive, it wouldn’t make losing Natsu any easier and she let out a shuddering breath, before speaking softly.

“Natsu…”

“Don’t…Please…” Natsu cut across her urgently, realising that at some point his expression must have given away his thoughts but he still wasn’t ready to hear it spoken aloud. Sighing she nodded silently in agreement, falling silent once more as she turned her attention back to the task of removing the rubble, wondering how long he could keep this pretence up.

*

    As she finally cleared off the last of the rubble, she let out a soft sigh, even though she knew that the worst was still to come as now she was afforded a clear look at his injuries and for a moment she floundered. The wounds were far worse than her initial observation had suggested and she swallowed hard, suddenly unsure of whether she was even capable of wrapping them up properly let alone taking care of them beyond that… _Oh Natsu, what have they done to you?_ She silently her emotions whirling between desperation and fury, hatred for the Dragons surging up in her chest and she closed her eyes gritting her teeth as she tried to calm herself slightly. She had never hated anything as much as she hated the Dragons that were slowly destroying her entire world, but she refused to say that in front of Natsu, knowing that while even he had his doubts, he still cared for Igneel with all his heart.

   Taking a deep breath, she reopened her eyes intent on setting to work to see what she could do for his injuries only to come up short as she realised that during her brief distraction his eyes had slipped shut, his face terrifyingly lax.

“Natsu! Natsu?!” Hastily she shifted closer and reached out to gently shake his shoulder, but there was no response to her actions, and despite the panic welling up inside she forced herself to let go, worried that she might cause more harm. Forcing herself not to fall apart she quickly checked his breathing and pulse, letting out a quiet noise of relief when she realised that he was still with her for now. Gently brushing her fingers through his hair, she studied his face for a moment before pulling back and reaching for her bag, realising that it was probably better if he was out for this as there was no way she was going to be able to avoid hurting him.

**

Half an hour later:

    As she tied off the final bandage Lucy let out a soft sigh, it had taken all of their remaining medical supplies to tend his wounds and at the end she had, had to resort to tearing material off her own clothes to cover the last couple. Glancing down she shuddered as she realised just how much of his blood had ended up on her skin and clothes, her stomach churning as she had to choke back bile. What made it worse was that she knew that her efforts were futile. The injuries had been far worse than she had first thought, and even now the bandages were slowly gaining crimson spots were his blood was soaking through.

   Choking back a sob she wiped her hands against her skirt, cleaning off as much of the blood as she could before reaching out to gently brush her fingers against his cheek, nearly recoiling as she realised that his skin was clammy to the touch and that his temperature was nearing that of a normal person. Sniffling she studied him with sad eyes, even unconscious his face was lined with pain, but despite that he looked ridiculously young at that moment, and she felt her eyes beginning to burn with increased intensity as she realised that he was never going to get the chance to become the man she could already see him becoming. Something inside her shattered at that realisation.

_Natsu…This Natsu…My Natsu is going to die here._

“I can’t do this anymore…” She whispered as she scooted back against the wall, burying her head against her knees as she lost the battle against her tears. It had been hard enough pretending that everything was fine when he was awake, but without him there to bolster her, she found it impossible to summon even a flicker of false hope. There was no way he could survive those injuries, even with his added strength and increased healing ability from being a Dragon-slayer, and forcing herself to glance up at his face she knew that there was a chance that he might never open his eyes again. The tears fell faster at the thought that she might have already lost her chance to say goodbye, and she buried her head once more as she began to weep in earnest.

**

An hour later:

“Lu…cy,” the weak whisper sounded deafening in the silence, and at once the Celestial mage’s head shot up, and she quickly shifted back to his side, reaching out to grasp his hand, a watery attempt at a smile slipping free as she felt his fingers curl around her hand. It was a terrifyingly feeble gesture, but she refused to acknowledge the weakness, instead turning her focus to his face, blinking when she realised that he hadn’t managed to open his eyes yet and she quickly squeezed his hand to reassure him that she was right there.

“Natsu?” She called softly and was rewarded by another soft noise, halfway between an acknowledgement and a whimper, and she waited patiently as his eyelids began to twitch as he struggled to force them open. It took several moments for him to manage to get them to crack open, and she began to murmur soft encouragements as they fluttered shut only to inch open once more, and it was a couple more minutes before he was able to keep them open and even then it was only at half-mast. She wasn’t going to complain though as a small part of her had been terrified that he might never open them again, and she waited until his gaze drifted in her direction and managed to focus before asking gently. “How are you feeling?”

“Never…better,” he replied slowly as his gaze drifted skywards as he took stock of his body. There wasn’t a single part of him that didn’t hurt, but the pain felt oddly distant now, and a small part of him realised that was probably a bad sign. Still, despite that, it was welcome relief after the previous agony, and he let his gaze drift back to Lucy as he added softly. “It doesn’t…hurt…as much now.” He hoped that hearing that would help to ease the concern burning in her eyes, his eyes narrowing slightly as he realised for the first time just how red her eyes were and the old flicker of rage that appeared whenever someone made her cry reappeared for a second… _but this time it was me that made you cry, I’m so sorry Lucy…I never wanted you to cry._

“That’s good,” Lucy whispered trying to sound encouraged by his words because she knew that he said them for her sake, but she knew that she had done nothing that could’ve helped with his pain, and her fingers tightened around his hand as she realised what that probably meant. Quietly she watched as he shifted slightly, clearly uncomfortable on the ground and she caught the pain that flickered across his face before he could mask it. She clenched her free hand into a fist, her nails digging into her palm as she tried to hold back the wail she could feel building in her chest.

“You idiot!” She cried suddenly and startled he swung his gaze back to her, and she swallowed hard as she realised that he was barely able to focus on her now. “Why? Why did you do all this? I’m not worth your life!” It had always been one of her greatest fears after the Dragons had arrived, that there would come a point when he would sacrifice himself just to protect her, and she felt her breath catching in her throat as she allowed herself to really acknowledge that it had finally happened. _Natsu…I never wanted you to go this far for me. If only you had left me behind you would still be fighting, and I’m sure that eventually, you would have found a way to beat the Dragons…but now…_

“Macao,” Natsu whispered after several minutes of silence, and she hated how weak his voice was, nothing like his usual loud self, and it took a couple of seconds for what he had said to register. _Macao?_ What did he have to do with this? It was months since he’d died and she couldn’t remember the last time Natsu had mentioned any of their Nakama, accepting that it was his way of showing just how much the recent events hurt him. Hesitantly she prompted him for an explanation, not wanting to stir old memories again, especially when he was already in more than enough pain as it was.

“Macao?”

“Remember he told…” Natsu whispered before trailing off, and she leant forward in alarm as his eyes slipped shut for a moment, desperately squeezing his hand even as she reached out to gently shake his shoulder, terrified that if he rested now, he might not wake up again. It took a few minutes but finally, he managed to inch his eyes open once more, and to her relief, he managed to refocus on her with little difficulty, but the relief was short-lived as she realised how hazy his gaze was.  “Sorry…He told me to protect what’s the most precious to me,” he continued softly, and there was an expression in his eyes that she had never seen before, and it simultaneously warmed and frightened her. _Why was he saying this now?_ She remembered that he had looked at her back when Macao had said it, but she had thought it was merely because she was the only one there…but then everything that had happened since and the closeness that had developed between them since then…

“Me?” She asked shakily, and there was a hint of embarrassment in his gaze as he gave a weak nod of acknowledgement. “But…”

“You…were my reason…” Natsu explained softly as he stared up at her, feeling the heat in his cheeks increasing, but knowing that if he chickened out of telling her now, then he wouldn’t get another chance.  “I…would have…given up long ago…if I hadn’t had you.”

“No you wouldn’t,” Lucy denied with utter certainty as she met his gaze, and he was startled by the sheer amount of faith he could see in her eyes… _How can you still believe in me? I am a Dragon-slayer, and yet I never managed to bring down a single Dragon…and now I’m about to leave you on your own…_ “You would have carried on fighting no matter what! I…I’m not sure I could…that I can,” she admitted softly, looking away as she realised that was the future that was awaiting her, and she missed the horrified expression that appeared on his face in response to her words.

“Don’t you dare give up,” Natsu whispered as he studied her, terrified to see that the brown eyes that he loved so much were now muddied with darkness, and despite the pain he forced himself to struggle into a semi-upright position. Ignoring her worried protests and the burning in his chest as he struggled to draw in enough air, he reached out to grasp her hand squeezing weakly until she met his eyes, his heart aching when tears welled up at whatever she saw in his face.  “Even if I’m gone you can’t give up,” he told her fiercely, although the impact was limited by the breathless tone he was forced to use.

“Natsu…” Lucy breathed as what he was saying registered and she shook her head slowly, deep down she realised that she had already given up even before he was injured, and now facing the fact that he was slowly slipping away from her in front of her very eyes she couldn’t muster even the slightest spark of determination or hope. _Natsu you can’t ask that of me…surly you must know that I wouldn’t have made it this far without you…_

“No!” Natsu cried desperately, paling as the effort drained what little remained of his strength, and he swayed for a moment before slumping forward. It was only Lucy swiftly reaching out to catch him that stopped him from collapsing completely, and for a moment he lay limply in her arms, panting heavily as he stared up at her with pleading eyes. “P-promise me….p-please.”

“I…”

“Lucy,” he cut across her protest only to break off as violent coughs tore through his body once more, and she was forced to watch helplessly as his body contorted with pain, desperately clinging to his hand as he tried to hold back pained cries. Finally, the fit subsided, and he was left limp in her arms, his eyes barely open as he struggled to draw in shallow breaths and she winced as she heard the soft wheezing coming from him. Yet he seemed to pay no heed to the fresh pain or deterioration in his breathing, instead struggling to focus his eyes on her and she could see that he was still waiting for an answer and she swallowed hard.

“Alright,” she agreed weakly, unable to refuse him when he was staring at her with such desperation, and she tightened her hold on him as his face melted into an expression of relief.

“Promise?”

 “I promise,” she whispered without hesitation, although inside she was cursing him for asking her to promise as she knew that there was no way that she would be able to give in now. Fairy Tail wizards always kept their promises, and no matter what happened she was still a member of Fairy Tail… _Damn it Natsu, you’re really making me go on without you?_

“T-thank you.”

     Silence fell over them for a few minutes as Lucy contemplated what she had just promised to do, while Natsu was lost in relief that she had given him her word that she wouldn’t give in when he was gone. He wasn’t stupid enough to think that was the end of it, and he realised that he had condemned her to continued existence in this hell and that on her own there might not be much that she could do…but at least there was a chance that she might find a way out of this hell, and he was willing to bet on that. His eyes slipped shut for a second as he rested his head against her chest, his lips twitching as the steady sound her heartbeat soothed him, reminding him that she was still there and alive and despite the pain it cause he found himself snuggling as close as possible.

“Natsu?” Lucy asked softly as she felt him shifting closer, blushing slightly as he nuzzled against her chest but she didn’t protest as she’d caught the oddly peaceful expression that had appeared on his face. Sighing softly she brought one of her hands up and began to gently run her fingers through his hair, a gesture that she knew he found soothing as he had often begged her to do it to try and drive away the adverse effects he suffered on transport.

“Lucy…?” Natsu whispered finally after several minutes of just enjoying the sensation, struggling to open his eyes once more and even when he succeeded his vision was blurred, and shadows were growing around the edges, and he could only just make out the rough shape of Lucy’s face floating above him. A shiver of fear went through him, and he wanted to scream and shout as he realised that his time was running out and desperately he reached out with a trembling hand to grasp Lucy’s arm, needing to tell her what she meant to him…that he didn’t want to leave her…

“Yeah I’m here,” Lucy replied, her eyes widening as she caught the terror that had appeared on his face and she could tell that even though he was looking directly at her, he wasn’t really seeing her and a lump rose in the back of her throat as he grasped her arm. “Natsu…”

“Somehow…Somewhere I will find…you again,” Natsu whispered weakly as his eyes slipped shut only to slowly inch open again a moment later. She could see the effort it was taking him to do that much, and her tears began to fall once more as she realised that he was fading and desperately she clung to him, trying to keep him with her that little bit longer as she realised what he was saying.

“I’ll be waiting for you,” She promised tearfully as she squeezed his hand, trying not to flinch as she realised just how cold he had become in the last few minutes and he smiled at the promise, and for a moment all she could do was stare at him. It was weak and had obviously taken a huge amount of effort, but at that moment his smile looked just as brilliant as the grin he had worn before all of this had happened and before she knew what she was doing she had leant forward and pressed her lips against his.

    Olive eyes widened for a moment and then she felt him weakly responding, and she let out a watery noise that was part laugh and part sob as she tried to pour everything she felt for him into the one kiss, realising that it might be the only one they would get. When they eventually pulled apart they were both blushing, but the terror and pain had faded into the background in Natsu’s face as he stared up at her with a look of contentment on his face, and she felt his fingers curling weakly around her hand once more.

“I…love…” His voice trailed off, the sentence incomplete as his eyes slipped shut once more and she waited desperately for that final word. Numbness creeping over her as she realised that she could no longer hear his laboured breathing and a moment later the hand that had been gripping her arm still fell away limply to the side, and her breath hitched in her chest. _Natsu…no, please Natsu you can’t leave me yet._ _It can’t be time, not yet!_ She was screaming in her mind, but outwardly she was silent as she stared down at him, desperately willing him to breathe, to open his eyes, to finish his sentence even though she knew that he was going to.

   Minutes passed as she just sat there staring blindly down at him, tears streaming freely down her cheeks as the reality of the situation began to settle in, and she felt something shattering deep inside her and yet she still couldn’t bring herself to react outwardly. Finally, she swallowed hard, and with trembling hands she pulled his body even closer, cradling it against her chest as she lent down to press a kiss into his hair.

“I love you too…” She managed to choke out, she had no idea if he could hear her wherever he was now, but she hoped that he could, that he knew that she felt the exact same way. Wishing that she had managed to say it long ago, cursing herself being too afraid to open her heart until it was too late and with a low cry she buried her face against his neck not caring that he was cool to the touch. _Natsu! I love you so much! I don’t know…I promised…but it hurts Natsu…it hurts more than I ever imagined it would…_

****

That evening:

   Tears trickled unendingly down her cheeks as she slowly set the last stone in place before shuffling back to stare at the cairn with dull eyes. The Dragon-slayer deserved a much better memorial than that, something that shouted out to the world just what it had lost…what she had lost…she choked out a sob as she fell to her knees, her fingers scrabbling on the ground as she desperately tried to hold in the scream she could feel forming in her chest. Glancing down her gaze fell on the back of her hand, and fresh pain lanced her as she stared at the now blank skin, flashing back to the moment when the final link tying her to Fairy Tail had disappeared…

_She was unsure how long she had been sat there holding Natsu, and there seemed to be no end to the tears falling down her face, and she wondered if she would ever be able to stop crying. Finally, though she became aware of a strange burning in her right hand, and reluctantly pulling away from the Dragon-slayer she lifted it up to examine, her eye eyes widening with horror as she took in the faint pink sparks rising from her skin._

_“My mark,” she whispered as she desperately reached out to try and grasp the sparks before they disappeared, but she had barely managed to brush her fingers against them when they faded from view and when her gaze returned to her hand it was to find that there was no trace of the mark. Months ago after Laxus had died, Natsu had questioned whether the guild mark would vanish if either of them ended up being the last one left, but she had brushed it aside unable to believe that the fates would be so unkind as to steal the mark away as well. But now as she stared at the blemish-free skin, she realised that she had been wrong…”I’m…the last Fairy.”_

   The reminder of that loss on top of Natsu shattered what little control she had over her emotions, and as it crumbled away a howl of anguish broke free before she could stop it. A small part of her was aware that she was going to attract attention, but she couldn’t bring herself to care even if it meant going against her promise. At that moment she wasn’t sure if she would be able to care about anything ever again, her head bowed as she descended into full body sobs, slowly curling into a lonely ball in front of Natsu’s grave as she lost herself completely to her sorrow.

****

    At some point she had cried herself to sleep, losing herself in dreams of happier times when they had all been together and fantasies of a future that had been torn away from them. Just before she woke the next morning though she had dreamed that Natsu had managed to finish his final sentence, and starting awake next to his cairn she had been struck by the realisation that she was the only one now who could change what had happened. Her eyes were still gritty and sore from all the weeping, and there was a gaping hole in her heart that she knew would never heal even if she managed to do something to change all this…certain that some point of her would always remember this loss, even if it was erased.

     Despite that realisation and even with the promise that she’d made to Natsu echoing in the back of her mind she found it nearly impossible to motivate herself to actually leave. The only thing she had with her now to remind her of Natsu was his blood-stained wristband which she was now wearing on her right hand, a small part of her had wanted to keep his scarf, but she knew that it belonged with him even to the end. Her fingers brushed the material on her wrist before she turned her eyes back to the cairn, blinking as for a moment Natsu’s face seemed to swim in front of her eyes, and even though she knew it wasn’t true she found herself reaching for him only to come up short as the image disappeared a second later.

“Natsu,” she whimpered huddling in on herself once more, hating the thought of having to leave him here on his own. She knew that he had often been haunted by the idea of their Nakama being left alone in various places around Fiore, and at the time she had reassured him that it was a foolish concern as no matter what she knew that their fallen friends would be able to find one another. Now faced with the idea of leaving him behind those reassurances seemed foolish and she reached out to lay a shaking hand on the cairn. “Will you be okay on your own?” She knew that he absolutely hated being on his own, that he had loved being on a team even when he had complained bitterly about having to partner up with Gray back in the early days…she had noticed that he came to her apartment more often if Happy was busy with the other Exceeds.

    _Somehow…Somewhere I will find…you again._ His words echoed in her mind once more and slowly a determined expression spread across her face, and she felt the promise wrapping around her like a reassuring warmth and her eyes softened slightly. Even now that he was gone, he was her strength, and she knew that she couldn’t just sit there, that he wouldn’t have wanted that for her even if it wasn’t directly going against her promise to hold on after he was gone.

“I promised that I would wait for you,” she said softly as she scrubbed briefly at her eyes before slowly climbing to her feet, gathering her bag as she did so and letting her hand drift down to the ruined coins at her side. “And I will…but I’m not just going to wait around. Somewhere out there, there must be something that can undo all of this, and I am going to find it somehow.” There was no real hope in her words, and she wasn’t sure that there was magic powerful enough to do what she wanted, but it was a goal…and one that she knew Natsu with his crazy imagination would approve of, and her lips twitched slightly at that thought.

     Taking a deep breath, she bowed her head towards the cairn, before finally forcing herself to turn away and walk away from him, each step sending fresh flares of pain through her heart and it was a battle not to turn around and run back to him. Stubbornly she raised her head and looked ahead, her eyes fixed on a distant point and whispering the last farewell she broke into a run, determined to put enough distance between them that she would not be able to give in to that desire.

   _Somehow, I will find a way to change all this…I’ll find a way to bring you all back. Wait for me Natsu, I’ll bring you home._

 


End file.
